What Is Wrong With This Picture?

by Mr. Schnell

I had to fill up the other day so I pull into the nearest service station, go inside and pay for my fuel. I walk back and start filling up when a car pulls into the next stall and the driver gets out smoking a cigarette.

Aware he has my undivided attention, he casually asks, “How’s it going?”

Petro fumes permeate the air. In my mind’s eye all I can see is that inevitable explosion, fire, maybe an ambulance ride to the local burn unit but, more likely, a trip to the morgue.

Momentarily speechless I manage to sputter, “You’re SMOKING!!!!!”

“Why yes I am. Thanks for noticing,” he boastfully utters while taking a long, deep drag, then immediately exhaling a vain display of perfectly formed serial smoke rings. Demonstration complete he turns and walks away, flicking ashes as he goes.

At the gas station store, some 25 feet away, he again turns, faces me triumphantly, disposes of the charred butt in the butt disposal can and enters (apparently inside there is a smoke free, no smoking policy).

He buys another pack of smokes. (He doesn’t need gas yet parked at a pump???)

Meanwhile I am done. Having survived a brief encounter with a typical “fly-over state” local inbred (of which this state is infamous for) I drive off unscathed, feeling lucky to do so, but also shaking my head in disbelief over the whole affair as hillbilly dueling banjos play in my head.

Published by undergroundcartoonist

Underground Cartoonist is a former ICU nurse that has worked at numerous civilian, military, and veteran Intensive Care Units across the country for better than three decades but has been sketching, drawing, and cartooning since he first picked up a crayon in kindergarten. Dabbled with political cartooning, writing, and general illustrations but the bread and butter came from health care. Recently left professional nursing to concentrate on camping, hiking, nature, the outdoors, trees, trails, and peace of mind. Love a campfire; rather watch it than TV. Avoid bureaucracy, career ladders, ladder climbers, and hero worship at all cost. Evenings spent with a good book, reading until the book smacks my nose when I doze off. Generally up at sun rise, listen to the mourning doves, put the coffee on, and play it by ear the rest of the day.

4 thoughts on “What Is Wrong With This Picture?

  1. Diesel won’t ignite but I guess they sell both kinds of fuel in most places?

    I don’t understand any of these concepts, smoking- never bothered, driving- rather bike, self preservation- hell! This guy might save you from a lingering painful death. Let’s have more dangerous pastimes, what about candle lit filling stations?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I used to “float” to the burn unit when they were understaffed. There are lots of ways to go but being burned is not an easy out. And checking out painfully because some moron has to smoke at a gas station…why there ought to be a law against it.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Unfortunately, there is no cure for stupidity! If stupidity no longer existed, many of us would be out of a job, most media outlets would have to shut down and politics would no longer be politics! On a more serious note, burning is HORRIFIC, be smart, stupid people!

    Liked by 1 person

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